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get well soon ayoh

  • ayoh = dad, father, ayah, bapa 
  • mok = mother, mama, ibu

for those who are getting confused :p joelis' dad is from kelantan, so that is how kelantanese calls a dad. 

18th jan 2013: i was up getting ready for school when lisa knocked on my bedroom door. as soon as i opened the door, she looked like she just finished crying. 

lisa: ma, jom balik kelantan!
me: hah? buat apa? surprised with her request early in the morning. i thought she was joking. 

when lisa showed me the sms from her dad. my head felt so warm immediately. it was somehow like an SOS call that our support is needed. i have to think fast. kaiser was still sleeping. i have to wait for him to wake up first. my head was spinning thinking of how to tell him, that we want to go to kelantan. i checked the flight info for that day. got a bbm from my mom, she wants to go too with with, it's gonna be 5 of us.

when kaiser woke up, and right after he's out of the bathroom... i told him

me: sayang.. we've got to go back to kelantan today.
kaiser: huh? why? with his morning blur face 
me: my FIL... *rephrase* kids' grandafather is in CCU in kota bharu hospital, we must go and visit. 
kaiser: hmmmm... why do YOU have to go?
me: because i care...

i drove to my parents house after we got ready packing... and took the next available flight.

when we reached kelantan, we took 2 cabs to the nearest hotel..ermm actually it was an inn.. just walking distance to the hospital. lisa called her dad.. trying to so hard not to tell him that we were there.    after late lunch, we walked to the hospital, guessing where to go with the minimal information that we received from lisa's dad. 

as we walked out of the lift, the first person was my sister in law, KAni. she was surprised to see all of us! :) it was a pleasant surprise.. my heart beat faster. i do not know what to expect.. and at that point of time, not sure how we are going to be welcomed. but one things for sure, i do miss that family. i miss them a lot.

KAni: ehh... AIN??
me: just smiled... and took her hands to salam and hugged her.. apa khabar KAni?
KAni: sihat.. alhamdulillah..bila sampai?
me: baru kejap ni... 
KAni: aahh... mari... mok ada kat luar... nak jumpa mok? 
me: haa buleh laa... 

KAni walked in front of us to lead the way... and just before we reached where mok was seated... she turned and ask...

KAni: err tapi AK ada... tak apa?
me: hah? owhh tak apa... tak ada masalah... 

AK is my joelis' stepmom. whom to me, doesn't matter... i am quite amazed with myself that i managed to be calm and just be me. i supposed i have learned to accept fate many years back just that we have not have a situation where we needed to be face to face. and alhamdulillah.. everything went well. and because i know how i feel... i was okay. i have always wanted to see how joey's younger brother plays with him... boy.. he was a handful.. cute... and active at the same time.. :)

lisa was the first to go in with my dad, i think, to see ayoh in the CCU... she ended crying.. i tried to hold back my tears.. in fact when i hugged my MIL, it wasn't that easy for me.. joey cried when he saw ayoh.. we were all praying so hard for him to get better. i looked at him, and felt that it has been a very long time since the last i saw him. i don't remember when. we were afraid to hold his hand... with tubes in his nose, poked next to his neck, on his hands... :"( it just broke our heart... in my heart it whispers, "please be strong ayoh... we love you..." when he looked at me, i felt that look... the look like it was unexpected of me to come all the way to kelantan with joelis and my parents. 

well, that is what love is all about. the bind between me and their son may have ended, but they will always be my parents in law and grandparents of our kids. 

19th jan 2013: we woke up for subuh and recite the yassin for ayoh... to ease him from all these difficulty... 

when we visited ayoh again in the morning.. he was much better... and the last visit before we left to the airport that evening... the doctor has taken out the blood tube from ayoh's neck.. alhamdulillah... and he managed to communicate with us..

ayoh: terimo kasih lahh .. maghi...
me: smiled.. tak dok apo lah ayoh... 
lisa: smiled...
joey: smiled...
lisa: ayoh.. nanti lain kali bila daddy balik kelantan lagi, lisa dengan joey ikut, okay. 
ayoh: smiled.. molek lah... 

and that was priceless... the smile, the conversation.. the situation... just us.. and ayoh... and it was time for us to leave... although.. it wasn't easy for us.. i walked to the left side of the bed... took his hand and kissed his hand... 

me: ayoh... mesti kuat ya... ayoh cepat sembuh... insyaallah, kita jupo lagi...
ayoh: nodded slowly... yor.. terimo kasih lah ya... kirim salam semua... 
me: insyaallah ayoh...

and we waved goodbye... it was indeed a quality precious time we spent in kelantan... and it was really great to see, nana, thira, kak nor, faiq, fareez, kak yah.. kak na.. kAni, abang Zi, abang Din... and owhh.. thank you mok for lending us the car :)

and thank you kaiser for allowing us to go... :)


~ huh..hate this feeling la kak..nak nangeh..sedey plaks..emo terlebih..ehehehe..

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when my son calls me by name instead of Mom :p

it has been a long time since my kids send me appreciation notes. i have begun to think that this is what i will have to go through and accept :) as my kids are growing up and they, especially joey, are no more as expressive as before, as when they were much younger. and perhaps, i should learn to be less sensitive about these things and just focus on them being a grown up. errmmm well not really about joey looking at his room condition!

but today, as i was rushing in the morning to open up my studio for yoga, they both came into my bedroom and gave me these :) hehehe :D it was funny, and thoughtful at the same time :D

ya Allah, thank you so much for giving me such beautiful children - please protect them wherever they go and may they both become anak2 yang soleh & solehah.  Love you both so much... Saaa & Adik :*