a different kind of love

this is not the first time i am telling you in my blog, that i have other postings in mind. but it is okay, i will write first before i lose my idea on what is making me happy and cannot stop smiling till today. perhaps this should be one of the what i should be grateful of notes. 

nothing surprises me anymore nowadays or shall i say - i do not appreciate surprises coz most of them today does not make me happy. but last weekend was different. what i have with MrH was something that i don't believe in before, which is, long distance relationship. 😸 but perhaps due to different circumstances, i am accepting this to happen in my life right now. of course with some conditions. 

i was feeling quite down - very down for the past few weeks. MrH has been very patience with me, at least until today. and i pray that he will be the same or better in our future together, vice versa. 

we don't see each other every day, and at the moment it is every 2 weeks. long distance relationship can be costly. 😜last saturday was really sweet. i feel hopeless coz in the health condition that i am right now, lots of things are on hold. i have been spending a lot on grab car and grab food. and my plan over the weekend pun merudum and i have been whining with MrH. well, sorry laa.. who else i can whine aka merengek to, anyway, kan. blaming him for spoiling me. we are not supposed to see each other this week. well, if you see me in person, memang i look like that 1 tough iron lady - kunun2 ala hati keras punya orang. but in reality - dalam hati ada taman. 

well cukup lah aku cerita ini set2 yang macam dalam movie, you were on the phone with your partner whom you think is far away from you - and when you open the front door of your house, he is right in front of the door!! haa tak rasa macam nak peluk or meraung happy ke? khennn?? so yes, that was what happened last saturday. 

after the 'debate' that i had with my 2 kids last week - memang aku sangat down and sedih. and aku dah penat nangis. so perhaps i choose to be quiet coz it will hurt me more at times when i speak. to my kids, be honest with me, your mom, jangan nak gi tempat lain cakap pi tempat lain. Allah tu maha Kuasa and i also know where you are. so, sendiri mau ingat ye. 

i think i will sign off for now.. don't want to kill my happy mode at the moment.