mixed feeling on a monday morning

it started yesterday i supposed.... help me feel better :'( maybe i am already feeling too saddened by it? i am still taking it... absorbing what is said... what is told to my face... am i not beautiful enough for him? no doubt, i am no mrs fitness.... i don't mind if people telling me and help me get to it... does he even know how tired i can be? i juggled everyday... not mentioning work tense... but having to run here and there... and fulfilling everyone's dream... erpppp... i am babbling.. i enjoy taking care of myself... i enjoy being fit... going to the studio to dance... or working out at the gym... but i have issues with weight... i need assistance at the gym, hence i needed a personal trainer... and if you are too busy for me... dont blame me if i dont go to the gym!!! i broke my tail bone before and i cannot lift up with my left arm so well... and i thought you understand??!! if after 3 years you cannot say it with love anymore... then i have nothing else to say....