March 21, 2019

Tragedy 28 Jan 2019

what is with 28th of the month? this morning on March 3rd, 2019 when i woke up, i realized something scary. i was admitted 'again' to the hospital on 28 Feb 2019, just 1 month after i was admitted at the hospital in Maldives on 28 Jan 2019. yes, twice in 2 months and on the same date? what a coincidence. 
twitted on 3 march 2019

how do i start? it happened on the 2nd day of my dive trip, and on the 2nd dive. it was just like any other dives. i wanted to have a separate posting on this incident in maldives. but as the time goes by, i get quite tired of irresponsible people who spread stories about my condition after the incident. 

28 Jan 2019: happened on the 3rd day in maldives and 2nd dive for the day. 2nd dive site was at Miyaru Kandu, one of the most famous dive spots close to Alimatha Village in Felidhoo Atoll, Maldives, a great place where you can observe big pelagic fish. In fact “Miyaru” is the Dhihevi name for “shark”, so it is of no surprise that Miyaru Kandu is a great dive spot for catching sight of sharks and other big fishes. (ref: http://www.elitedivingagency.com/articles/miyaru-kandu-felidhoo-atoll/)

i will share what i can still remember. my brain is trained to keep only certain information in my memory box. i remembered diving at 30m depth. everyone was queuing and hooked while watching the sharks show i would call it. aku jeling kat dive comp aku, stated 30m and a number 3... and masa tu aku fikir, aku ada 3 min je ke kat dalam sedalam ini? and aku tengok orang lain relax je.. aku pun relax la.. aku tenang and seronok tengok sharks tu although aku tak la rasa seselesa selalu sebab pakai contact lense.


lepas tu aku jeling balik kat dive comp aku. aku dah terasa macam terlalu lama pulak at that depth and aku rasa macam dive comp aku dah berbunyi. aku jeling lagi and tengok ada number 6 kat situ. aku fikir balik, "maksudnya aku ada 6 min je ke lagi? atau aku dah kena naik?" and tak berapa lama lepas tu, DM Pino unhook semua reef hook kitorang. at least i know he unhooked mine. DM Pino checked on every one of us if we are ok. and semua dah respond ok. termasuk lah TK who checked on me too. so far sepanjang trip ni, aku notice TK pun sentiasa ada dekat2 dengan aku and dia rajin check on me. alhamdulillah i have caring people around me. and aku senyum sambil balas dengan sign OK kat TK who was on my right.
at that point of time we were all swimming against the current. i saw Lind was struggling underneath me, and i thought of helping her. i was feeling good and not tired at all.. swimming and looking at the nice deep blue ocean. my thoughts.. dalam kedalaman air macam ni, if anything were to happen, memang kena redha and pasrah je. and i was glad that i am fit enough, i enjoyed the swim coz boleh la exercise peha aku, my thought at that time. and by then aku tengok DM Lee dah swim nearer to me and DM Pino pun dah capai Lind.

and suddenly something happened.. i was just looking at my dive com and at 28m depth... and i tried to inhale, to breathe. i just couldn't, i felt like something stuck or that was the limit that i have. or kalau nak explain further, for divers, cuba you all imagine you all nak inhale and ada orang tutup tank korang, that is how i felt at that time. i quickly looked at my dive gauge, i still have 130 bar of air. and that is still sufficient. aku jeling dekat gang aku kat depan, and my thoughts immediately,

i am sorry guys..

coz aku tau, aku akan menyebabkan this dive trip pendek. and we will all have to naik cepat. when honestly aku tak tau macamana nak fikir or cakap sebab at that depth, aku boleh harapkan Allah je. aku try lagi sekali to inhale, but i still couldn't.

aku dah terbayang2 anak2 aku..dalam bayang2 keadaan aku dalam air waktu tu...

are they ready to be without me? sorry sayang2 mama, i cannot do anything now. i have no capability anymore. i am His.

and time tu memang aku berserah.. the next thing that came out of my mind was AH.. i was truly talking to my Creator at that point of time. the exact words that i remembered while talking to Him was,

Ya Allah, setakat ini sahaja kah kebahagiaan yang Kau bagi pada aku untuk bersama AH?

masa tu aku teringat memang macam drama sangat la kan ayat aku dengan Allah, but i remembered those words in my mind. and at that point of time too, aku tak berdaya except berserah pada Allah. and in my thoughts, demi Allah, aku bersyukur that Allah gave me that happiness with AH walaupun sekejap...

aku toleh ke kiri aku, i saw DM Lee who has always been close to my side in all my dives in maldives... aku hulur tangan kiri aku... and he, who is always alert, saw me just at the right time.

to be continued click here 👉: Allah swt gave me a 2nd chance... #alhamdulillah

Note: Irresponsible people, you all can judge me all you want, i don't care... but until these things actually happen to you, you will not know... sesungguhnya apa yang terjadi adalah ketentuan Illahi, aku redha.

Continuation from Maldives Here I Come Ep 03.  👈

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