it's all about the little things that matter to me
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proud of myself
hehehe :D why? cause i woke up earlier than usual. when kaiser woke up to send lisa to school, i got up too. woke joey up for subuh prayer. then i went downstairs to put some dirty laundry in the washing machine. collected some ironed clothes upstairs, put in joelis' room and ours. the duties are... the maid will do the folding and ironing, and all of us at home should sort our own clothes. :) somehow, i felt quite guilty when kaiser has been doing lots of the laundry job at home. so, this morning i decided to clear the clothes before he comes back from sending lisa :) while i am upstairs after sorting out the clothes, my turn to perform the subuh prayer... then, went downstairs again to get more clothes... hmmmm seemed to have lots of clothes huh?? :P you are darn right :) washing machine stopped, i started to hang the clothes when kaiser came home. he was surprised to see me hanging the clothes early in the morning.. he he he... "are you okay?" he asked... i just smiled at him and nodded. "are you sick or what? why are you up so early" heheheh :D i feel good about myself :)
but now i am sleepy... how laa... :P LOL.. 3.10pm and at the office.. :P
i sort of started again with my fitness pal apps. but still too lazy to update food intake. you must be asking then why do i even bother have the apps? hahhah LOL 😀 well, because i sort of plan to update my fitness ranting there. coz they have a blog too. so yeah.. i will try to update my fitness story there and not here.. or maybe depends on my mood? errmm.. **being fickle.. hahaha 😀
so here is the link for my latest update. i think you can have the option to follow that blog or maybe you will have to request first?
or some people can say it is called headache. but this headache was really really bad that i felt like my eyes are popping out. i wish i can hate him or dislike him. is that what he is trying to do? testing my patience? Allahuakbar... please please ease it for me. let me see his flaws that i can get him out of my mind because that is what it seems that he wants me to do. but being me, i always see positive things in people - most of the time. in fact when i was mentally abused, i still see the good part of my abuser. these were what i learned through my difficult time before. that i trained myself to be positive. the bad side of it - i get stepped on. **sigh**
can't be talking/writing too much about this because this is the path that i have chosen. trying to get as many distractions but nothing seems to work. is it that strong my feelings for him? damnnn
what has this got to do with the title???? it messes with my head - that is why!
Jangan lagi kau sesali keputusanku Ku tak ingin kau semakin kan terluka Tak ingin ku paksakan cinta ini Meski tiada sanggup untuk kau terima Aku memang manusia paling berdosa Khianati rasa demi keinginan semu Lebih baik jangan mencintaiku aku dan semua hatiku Karena takkan pernah kau temui, cinta sejati
Berakhirlah sudah semua kisah ini Dan jangan kau tangisi lagi Sekalipun aku takkan pernah mencoba kembali padamu Sejuta kata maaf terasa kan percuma Sebab rasa ku tlah mati untuk menyadarinya Semoga saja kan kau dapati Hati yg tulus mencintaimu Tapi bukan aku