Grab the Opportunity

Richard Branson, businessman, investor, and founder of Virgin Group, says that opportunity favours the bold, a lesson that he learned early on, and has used to guide the Virgin story.

“If somebody offers you an amazing opportunity but you are not sure you can do it, say yes – then learn how to do it later,” he said.

i attended a business opportunity talk with my sister (N3) and my cousin AN yesterday. each time i want to be motivated, i will attend such talks. there were so many corporate personnels who actually resigned or decided to retire early to do this business full time. when i saw ms nancy last night, she was a sales director of a private company, and she resigned to do this business full time, all her reasons matches my reasons.

at that point of time, i just felt like i want to resign immediately and do this full time. her talk was very inspiring and from someone who do not believe in network marketing, she is now 1 of the high achievers in STWW, NuSkin. Yes, the company is NuSkin. a huge company from USA who has lots of products for different needs, for the outside of your body to the inner health. 

somehow, i was telling AN last night as i was listening to ms nancy, i visualized myself standing there, on that stage, telling my side of the story, about my journey in NuSkin and sharing my experience, and my sharing moments with lots of people whom i can help with their consent. sometimes in this world, we really wish we can help so many people by sharing our own story but to some, they are just story and they do not want to help themselves. i wish there are more people who would be open to these natural products instead of getting those drugs in their system.

sometimes people do not see the opportunity when it is given to them. 

My Happy Pills

takat nak letak ayat2 poem yang jumpa dalam internet terasa geli geleman sebab jiwang terover. walaupun sekarang ni boleh la kalau korang nak kutuk kata aku jiwang. kalau2 korang ada yang nak gelakkan aku sebab aku bercintan balik. tapi kalau ye pun aku bercintan, masalah ke pada korang? aku menyusahkan korang ke? atau korang jeles sebab aku masih boleh bercintan? alaa pada korang yang in a relationship - apa lah salahnya korang semarakkan balik rasa kasih sayang antara korang daripada static je. belajar mengappreciate balik orang yang sentiasa ada depan mata korang, yang jaga korang. 

aku pun kena jugak sedar diri - sebab dok sibuk bercintan dengan kamal adli, nanti lelama MrH jeles pulak... hik hik walaupun kamal adli tu tak tau pun kewujudan aku. 😝 ala.. apa2 pun romantik2 kamal adli tu semua dalam lakonan jer.. tapi kasih sayang, rindu and caring MrH untuk aku is real. kannn.. 

MrH has been my calming potion since ketiadaan Lisa kat KL ni. nanti2 pun kalau Lisa dah balik KL tak sure if she can still be my calming potion sebab aku rasa macam aku dah banyak menyusahkan anak2 aku. and aku kena belajar jugak hidup tanpa mengharapkan apa2 dari diorang. aku sebak sangat sebenarnya. tapi tak pe lah. people change as they grow up or through the time. but that doesn't mean they don't love you anymore. aku pun sebenarnya sangat2 confuse apa yang dah berlaku antara aku dengan anak2 aku. maybe aku tak setara dengan mak2 kawan2 diorang - yang sememangnya aku berbeza dengan all mothers out there. benda ni hakikat - and apa2 pun aku tetap mak diorang and aku dah cuba sehabis and semampu boleh untuk jaga diorang dari tak boleh buat apa2 - sampai lah sekarang when they can do things on their own. 

maybe sebab tu Allah hantarkan MrH untuk aku. Allah swt knows that i deserve to be happy after all the hardship and sadness through the broken marriages that i have to go through. kadang2 emosi aku pun tak stabil and MrH jadi mangsa aku emo. alaaa MrH pun apa kurangnya. dia ni pun jiwa sangat sensitive. tak semua benda aku boleh cerita dengan dia pun - nanti start lah dia over thinking. 

so last weekend when he was back in KL memang melegakan aku.. sebab aku tengah serabut sangat2 and aku sedih and semuanya lah. and i am so glad he was back. i wish i can have him longer tapi nak buat macamana, long distance relationship macam ni lah.. memang kena banyak sabar. cuma persoalan nya sampai bila boleh sabar macam ni eh? tiap kali nak say goodbye for him to get back to work mesti aku sedih and rasa sunyi balik.. haisshhh ... i am stronger than this! 

masa ni sajer je dia nak ambik gambar tanpa muka dia.. acah2 lelaki misteri, gitu. 

Quiet Weekend

It is a quiet long weekend for me. MrH is back to visit his twin brother who just got out of surgery for his shoulder injury. 

Today is my hair saloon day. And also my moment where I would rather be quiet, reading a book, or browsing the internet.. or sometimes will fall asleep on the chair while getting my hair color done. 

There is 1 cute maybe 4 or 5 year old girl who would just chat with anyone in the saloon. Rajin MrH melayan.. Entah la sekarang ni aku memang macam ni, kalau ada mood aku layan la budak2 baya2 macam ni membebel. If not aku akan bolayan and tengok je diorang. 

Anyway, sekarang tengah rasa letih exhausted, tak tau kenapa.. malam tadi tengok bola.. dok harap la Perak menang, dapat gak MrH cuti tapi malangnya tak menang.. don't like goodbyes.. but that is how we are I guess.. 

eh by the way semalam masa balik dari PCMC saw 1 nice bmw yang memang aku tak pernah nampak.. aku rasa macam futuristic betul kereta tu.. kaya betul depa ni beli kereta macam ni.. bila aku nak kaya cash ni? 

Still not OK

last wed, memang aku sakit kepala sangat. dah start since tues lagi tapi aku tahan kan jugak. migraine aku kali ni memang extreme. sebab banyak sangat benda berserabut dalam kepala otak aku. so on wed tu memang dah tak tahan. aku try tutup mata kejap kat surau office, tu pun dah pukul 4.45pm and sangat2 aku tak tahan. aku panaskan eye pad kat microwave kejap and pakai kat surau. untuk relaxkan mata yang terasa macam nak tercabut. tapi seems like tak reda. aku bangun solat asar. masa tunduk tu, ya Allah ngilu nya kepala aku dah macam nak pengsan. i quickly keluar dari surau and texted my cousin if she has arrived my office. and since dia dah sampai aku terus balik, awal 3 minit dari biasa tapi memang aku tak larat sangat.

i told my cousin that i want to go straight to the clinic. sampai je kat clinic aku dah gigil, nak berjalan pijak tanah pun bergegar kepala aku, and i cried bila sampai kat dalam bilik doctor. dah tak boleh bukak mata. doctor checked bp aku naik tinggi sebab menahan sakit doct cakap. terus aku dapat injection. how i wish MrH is with me.. coz aku tau dia mesti jaga and manjakan aku 😚 but time tu MrH tak de, so aku kena sabar je lah. malam tu aku bagi kunci kat my cousin for emergency. i got 1 day MC dari bekerja. 

since i am on MC i decided to go gleneagles hospital pulak to get myself checked to follow up lepas last time i got discharged and belum baik sakit. so i did another xray for my lungs and blood test. result keluar, i am having another infection at my lower left lungs. so, i am back on antibiotics sekarang ni for 1 week. and no vigorous exercise which memang aku tak buat pun lagi.. since discharged and will see this Friday for the next check up.

macam tergantung kan posting ni... hehehe 😁

Alhamdulillah Another Year Wiser

count your blessings, orang kata. MrH awal2 dah bagitau, dia akan balik KL minggu birthday aku. which at that point of time, honestly aku tak rasa apa2. rindu MrH tu memang routine aku, cuma maksud aku, aku tak rasa pun birthday aku is an important date for me. mungkin sebab aku frust aku tak dapat fly ke USA on the date yang sepatutnya aku fly. 

MrH tanya aku banyak kali:

• aku nak makan apa? 
• aku nak buat apa? 
• aku nak pergi mana? 

and aku masih tak de jawapan yang konkrit. sabar sungguh dia dengan aku. memang aku tengah moody pun. sorry MrH, aku masih sedih dengan penangan anak2 since last week. but MrH tu sabar je dengan aku..and aku rasa syukur sangat to have him around. ni lah yang kita selalu dengar, Allah swt punya perancangan tu memang tepat pada masanya. Allah swt pun tau yang anak2 semakin membesar, they will have their own plans. memang la aku sangat tak sangka yang Joey akan ignore aku sampai macam ni sekali. keras betul hati dia and memang membuatkan aku tertanya2, marah sangat ke dia dengan aku? part mana yang aku buat salah dengan dia? jangan sampai jadi insiden masa dia shut us all out macam masa dia form 2 or 3 sudah.. and to regret 2 years later, tak de gunanya. sebab we cannot change the history, we can only learn from it. and i hope and pray that he will not have to go through another regret in his life - ubah lah.. dengar lah nasihat orang yang lebih tua. 

on my birthday eve, tetiba aku terasa nak makan western, so aku bagitau MrH ada 1 western restaurant yang sedap and reasonable harganya. so aku pun buka lah offer kat whatsapp group kalamsclan. and that night, just me & MrH, mama, ayah and mahsuri clan.. wahh dah ada mahsuri clan.. hehehe 😁

elok je diorang sampai kat venue - dah totop rupanya restaurant tu. tak pe lah tak de rezeki.. and aku pun terus teringat kat TheGarageKL, along MRR2 highway. untung2 ada orang main music nanti, and yey.. ada busker malam tu. we had good food, good company, and kids enjoyed themselves playing buih sabun. aku pun happy tapi masih terasa that emptiness and sebak. apa2 pun aku sentiasa doakan anak2 aku di dalam perlindunganNya.

YaYa ni memang sentiasa melekat dengan MrH!

YaYa she cheered up my night 

Sepi

aku tau kata2 yang orang akan cakap, selagi kita ada Allah swt, kita takkan rasa sepi atau sunyi - atau omputih kata feeling lonely. tapi i am a mom. i know i am not a perfect mom. aku tak kan cakap yang i have done the best i could coz all moms (mostly) will do the same for their kids. cuma i wish i have not shared so much of how i feel with my kids, my sadness or perasaan kecewa dalam kehidupan aku kat anak2. i used to be much stronger when they were smaller kids. going back to history, i used to cry out so much outside of the house and when i am home - i will be the happiest person on earth coz i won't show those to my kids - my sadness. and when my kids have grown, i slowly shared with them how i truly feel about certain things - which now i regret it.

mungkin dalam pada aku share atau aku mengadu dengan anak2 time tu, it was too heavy or too much for them to handle? or maybe they were trying to be strong jugak for me - for my support but at the same time diorang rasa tertekan sendiri? oh my god... i am so sorry kids... i am sorry that if i put you both in that position - had i known you will get so badly affected, i would not have done that. tak ada pun a mom who would want their children to suffer :'( 

i looked back at the pictures of us, JoeLis and i when i celebrated my birthday - we looked so happy then. i really hope they were too then. this year i don't even get a message from joey. it really breaks my heart. busy sangat ke anak aku ni sampai birthday aku pun dia tak de masa nak message. is it too much for me to ask from a son? kat mulut aku boleh cakap, tak pe lah, it was just another day - tapi hati aku sendiri aku tak boleh nak tipu. of course on special days like this, you will automatically expect wishes from special people in your life kan. entah lah.. kalau fikir banyak sangat mau depress jadinya. 

and i don't know where is this posting heading... i should get back on track focusing on what makes me happy and be grateful about it. 

3 Things You Should Do For Effective Weight Loss

Have you ever felt that you have tried almost everything to lose weight but you are just about to give up? Or you have already gave up? Do you feel tired everyday, feeling sleepy and it is not even 2.00 pm yet, not even half a day. Do you have short of breath while walking in longer period? 

source: NuSkin

Losing weight can be tough if you do not have the correct guidance how to go about it. What I want to share here is, I saw my sister's changes. My sister is the toughest person for me to advice to lose weight. She decided to make changes when she almost fall asleep while driving back from work. She went to the doctor and she found out that her sugar level increased and until she was advised to get the insulin injection. She gets short of breath when she needed to walk up the stairs for her classes. That is when she said to herself, she must do something to make a change in her life, for her own good!

After the programe she lost 10kg and still working on losing more. She has the energy the whole day. She doesn't get angry and cranky as much like she used to, and most fun part, she managed to join the whole 1 hour of ZUMBA class non stop!!

if she can do it in 90 days, why can't you?

Tell Someone

When you share with someone your plan, it will be like a vow that you need to follow through. And someone who cares enough for you, to push you when you effort deteriorates. Use them to motivate you. 

Challenge Yourself

If you have not done anything for exercise, start with walking or jogging on a treadmill. Or if you are used to doing the same routine, try and do different exercises. By constantly performing different workouts, you utilize varying muscle groups to maximize fat burn.

source: NuSkin

Have a Plan

If you’re looking to lose excess kilos, having a guide makes a big difference. Give Nu Skin’s ageLOC TR90 system a go. This 90-day breakthrough weight management and body shaping programme is based on highly innovative gene expression science and targets both mind and body for a healthier, leaner you.

As part of the ageLOC TR90 system, you’ll be given a simple and nutritious eating plan to follow. Instead of dramatically reducing your intake of certain food groups like in traditional diets, the ageLOC TR90 eating plan is tailored to include a balanced amount of foods that help to burn fat while promoting lean muscle and increasing your metabolism. This helps to reduce unhealthy food cravings and support appetite control.

Additionally, the ageLOC TR90 system also comes with a range of products that are designed to work in harmony with the eating plan. They are:

• ageLOC TR90 JumpStart

When embarking on a new weight loss journey, getting off to a good start is the key to success. ageLOC TR90 JumpStart provides you with that boost by promoting healthy metabolism, supporting lean muscle mass and controlling your appetite. Take this during the first 15 days of the programme in the morning by mixing it into water or your favourite beverage.

• ageLOC TR90 Complex

The ageLOC TR90 Complex is meant to help you get your healthy metabolism back on track while maintaining lean muscle mass. Take two capsules twice daily 15-20 minutes before meals.

• ageLOC TR90 Control

Keep your appetite in check and reduce cravings with ageLOC TR90 Control. It also helps to support a positive mood and mindset while dieting. Take two capsules twice daily 15-20 minutes before meals.

• ageLOC TR90 TrimShake

This is a meal replacement shake that’s made with high-quality protein for muscle health. It helps you feel fuller for longer by promoting a feeling of satiety. Each packet of ageLOC TR90 TrimShake is equal to one serving of protein and one serving of carbohydrates. For best results, replace your heaviest meal of the day with this.

The ageLOC TR90 system is for all adults aged 18 and above who are looking for a healthy weight management solution. Pregnant or lactating women and those with known medical conditions should consult their doctors before use.

To find out more about the ageLOC TR90 system, whatsapp Ms Ain at 012-2905653 (Brand Representative) for an appointment. 

Benefit of Weight Loss

My Low Season

i have been feeling so down for the past 2 weeks. 2 weeks ago i had a fight with MrH and it makes me so sad, it was such a waste of time arguing and fighting with him. i was feeling so tired. the long distance relationship is already a tiring one for me, maybe for him too, i don't know, but i am just exhausted. i am also already tired on the uncertainty, and now being far and angry. *sigh*  and baru a few days feeling ok dengan MrH, now issue dengan anak2 pulak. 

there are certain things about my kids and i, that i am not able to share with MrH coz i feel either he will not understand or he will take it wrongly. 

i believe my kids and i have issues bottled up even since my divorce(s). Lisa with his dad and Joey with his papa (i presumed) and i did not see this coming coz i always thought that my kids are strong and understand what was going on, but i missed realizing or noticing that there is a feeling of loss in both of them. 

bringing up children is never ending. even after your children gets married and have their own children. i see that in my parents and i. at the age of 46, my parents still check on me if i have eaten. and still wanted to prepare food for me. i am not sure where this posting is going but i have lots of things in my mind right now. and it is all about people i love so much around me. 

i thought i have done my part being a mom - bringing up my kids without their own dad's presence. alhamdulillah i have close family around me to help and i can cope so far. both of my kids are at the university. and i thought that is enough. i build them well - their inner. but i didn't know that they have issues from my previous divorces. 

it is sad that my relationship(s) has caused emotional issues in my children. it was much easier to reach out when they were kids, cause we can talk. unlike now. i always want to be different from my parents way of teaching. but now that i have grown up kids, perhaps it made me understand that it gets more and more difficult to reach out to them. 

i only have 2 kids, whom last time, i thought we can be best of friends when they grow up. but when lisa goes to USA to further her studies, i felt lost when at the same time, she felt her real freedom being on her own. i am happy to see her happy but feeling envy at the same time coz she is happy without me. i felt useless as a mom. she talks to her friends more than me. but at those times, when i became sad and misses her, i will always pray that she is surrounded by good people and Allah protects her from evil. i would think that she is more comfortable to be with her friends now. as a mom, i can just watch and pray for her from far. it breaks my heart when we get into a fight the last time she came home. and i felt attacked by my own daughter. and ever since i did not tell her anything about my relationship. i am tired typing... and my chest feels so heavy right now. i don't like going back telling all these story. but i want my daughter to know that i miss her so much and i wish i was still her favorite person to talk to. i am sorry that i do not understand you like how you want me to. i wish you and joey didn't have to go through all these challenge being children of divorced parents. 

each time i have a fight with joey, i will always remember the moment that joey and i spent our times together at a japanese restaurant at wangsa walk mall. at that time, he has not entered university yet. he was still juggling on what to do after his SPM. and i was still alone, not having anyone special in my life. after my divorce with Kaiser, i kind of like the idea of being single. of course i do get lonely at times but at least i can skip the sad part if someone were to break my heart or make me unhappy in the relationship. but by having someone in my life now, i don't want any of my kids to think or feel that he is replacing them in my life. having MrH added value in my life, someone i can talk to when i am down and someone who makes me laugh, who takes care of me when i needed someone to be with me. i hope my kids understands that MrH is never a replacement of any of them. Lisa and Joey will always be my kids and priority if they want me to. 

Joey sekarang bukan Joey yang dulu. He is more quiet nowadays (that i noticed but i don't know how to breakthrough that) and he has become a temperamental person. With that kind behavior, I always choose to be quiet and do things on my own instead of asking him for help. I cannot ask where he is going in details coz then I felt that he is hesitant to tell me. He is getting far and far away from me when I wish/hope last time that he would be the one taking care of me when I grow old, based on our conversation that 1 night. Nowadays whenever I tegur him for his own good, he will always resent as though I am finding fault or thinking that he is not good enough. When all I did was just out of care as a mom towards her children. 

so when we had into another fight last weekend, i felt so broken and i felt that my kids are going further and further away from me. i don't know what to do. since joey blocked me on his whatsapp,  i take it as he doesn't want to talk to me. all i can do is just pray for their safety and happiness. i cannot force people to love and be with me forever, even if they are my own flesh and blood. and i just want them to know that i miss them all the time. and this is not self pitying coz if you feel so, you are so wrong about your own mom. i have done all i can to do the best that i could for both of you, and your education. if you feel you don't need me anymore, i can do nothing about it. 

yes, i am only human, and this, is my lowest in my life and yet, i have to get up every morning and act as though i am ok and still needs to go through life - kalau tak, siapa yang akan bela aku? i have no one. and by me writing all these down is not to bring down my own children because i know they are very good children - it is the circumstances that has done this to us. this is my blog and this is the place i need to distress. and at the same time, i will learn to be a good listener.

JoeLis, if you are reading this, i am here for you and I miss you both so much that it hurts. And also i wish that both of you understand and know that you can always talk to me about anything even if MrH is around. 

Raya 2018
i wish we can be happy like how we are in this photo

Setelah Terlafaznya Akad

i dont know why but now tengah suka sangat tengok kamal adli. since few weeks ago aku terasa kamal adli ni macam MrH pun ada. tak la exactly the same tapi somehow ada la iras2 dia... and sweet sweet dia.. currently ada 2 drama yang aku tau kamal adli berlakon. but tau2 je lah drama melayu ni, mesti pasal dengki mendengki and in law tak suka lah, and berlaku kejam lah. so, untuk mengurangkan stress aku, i decided to watch cerita 'setelah terlafaznya akad' compared to the other one. 

drama ni ada sampai ep 28 tapi aku baru sampai ep 6. after every episode aku akan emo. bila emo tu, kadang sedih sampai nangis or kadang sampai sengih sampai telinga. and kadang2 aku tengok kamal adli, aku jadi rindu sangat dengan MrH. lepas tu aku akan whatsaap MrH. kesian MrH, dah la sibuk study, kena layan aku yang meroyan just because of a drama. 

semalam aku layan sampai ep 6, pastu geram, sedih, happy tengok cara si Hanan (kamal adli) tu layan Nawal (Uqasha Senrose) padahal itu wife dia kut. dah start sayang tu buat la cara sayang. masih cinta dengan bekas isteri kunun. risau anak membesar tanpa ayah kunun. padahal betul lah cakap kawan si Hanan tu walaupun Hanan tu kawin dengan orang lain pun or his ex wife kawin dengan lelaki lain pun, he is tetap the father. 

dah macam2 Nawal buat for her husband tapi masih buta hati si Hanan ni. tapi kalau ada lelaki lain syok or pandang kat Nawal, tau pulak cakap pasal hak suami etc... puihhhh...

malam tadi bila aku cerita bertubi2 kat MrH, tersengih lebar dia dengar aku cerita beriyer. i got so affected by the drama. and yes watching that drama pun buat aku makin rindu kat MrH. MrH sebenarnya a more serious person la compared to kamal adli. tapi bila time lawak dia, ada la jugak.. lorat dia tu.

kalau korang tanya detail pasal kenapa aku teringat kat MrH, aku pun tak leh explain detail. kadang sama kadang tak.. of course MrH aku best lagi.. hehehe 😁 sila jangan muntah. maybe i should find gambar MrH kalau betul ke sama muka dengan kamal adli. 😁 ermm ok, kamal adli punya raut muka lebih panjang... and hidung MrH lain...hihihi 😁

tengah takut ni sebab tak tau apa ending cerita tu... but biasanya happy ending lah kan...please la... please laaa.... whatever it is, lakonan diorang semua memang sempoi and bersahaja. really enjoyed the drama walaupun ada jugak sakit hati nya. means berjaya la all the pelakon kan?

Sebak - Part II

And due to this, I could not attend the training session yesterday. I know I will not be able to focus. Aku dah rasa that creeping feeling inside of me and I can feel that I can just burst into tears at any moment. (Actually dah ternangis pun) Kalau lah aku ni sihat 100% macam dulu, I would just dance myself out, or call my PT and will do my weight training with him, but currently at the state of my health right now, I have some limitations. 

So, I decided to do some walking. Nak jalan2 atas treadmill, memang muntah kebosanan lah aku kan.  Jogging and walking on treadmill is so not me. I'd rather sleep in my bed than doing something as boring as that. Tak leh imagine macamana some people can do that for half hour or so. And thanks to AA for accompanying me. Sekarang ni pun aku rasa I cannot be doing exercises alone, walaupun just brisk walk. Somehow at times, I can just get weird spasm which I cannot explain where and why. 

Semalam mengah jugak but alhamdulillah we managed to walk like 5km for 75 minutes and i burnt 1400++ calories. Felt a bit lega and ease the serabut-ness in my head. 

Our walk terinfluenced got distracted by Thai Food Festival kat Wangsa Walk Mall. Tak tau yang ada lagi, I discovered masa weekend haritu tu masa MrH and I nak pi sana to collect baju Lisa yang hantar pergi alter. 

Sebak

i am at this juncture that i am feeling 'sebak' and aku pun tak tau macamana nak keluarkan rasa tu dari dalam diri aku. see, and i don't even know how or where to start, tapi aku rasa kecewa sangat. it sounds so drama, i know. i am not going to get into details or even general sangat. i am talking about me. tapi aku rasa macam aku dah make it clear what is expected in a relationship. 

there are so many reasons for a relationship to fail. kalau betul2 tak de chemistry, the relationship did not start pun at the first place. the most saddest thing to happen is when it fails disebabkan oleh surrounding yang sememangnya tak de kena mengena pun dengan you as a couple.

surrounding or orang2 sekeliling yang sebenarnya tak penting dalam hidup you and your partner, and yet, you let those, i don't know what to call it at the moment but yeah... those yang sepatutnya tak de kaitan dalam hidup you, affect the harmony of your relationship. berbaloi ke?

sekarang ni memang aku sedih aku sebak etc etc... aku tak boleh nak tukar sejarah, in fact aku rasa it is fair to say sebenarnya tak de siapa boleh tukar sejarah. kalau tak, tak de la wujudnya phrase, in a relationship, "i take you today and tomorrow on wards".

entah lah, aku rasa macam nak nangis tapi it is too sad that i cannot even cry. tangan aku seram sejuk, aku jadi trembling and sedih. for some people boleh je tido when issues aren't resolved, tapi bukan aku. 

ahh serabut lah. and i thought, i didn't have to go through this kind of unnecessary misery anymore in my life. 

sekarang ni jugak kepala aku rasa berdenyut2, and dada aku so tight. 😓

Determination

Original posting from my IG: @zin_ako

Getting there.. After discharged from the hospital on 17 May, 2019 - i had the moon face effect due to steroid medication from the whole 12 days at the hospital. .

To be honest, there are many mean people out there. People whom you hardly meet or even so called friends. Without them even asking if I am OK, they simply attacked me with statements on how I looked physically and how fat I have become.

Yes I got affected by those words. Why? Because I am already not well, I cannot do any exercises due to my swollen ribs and injured lungs that has not fully recovered. .

With the pain I had to endure, and people bashed me with mean words. .

Well I guess, I still have those people who have actually been there for me and morally supported me. #alhamdulillah #thankyou

After more than 1 month, I am happy to see progress. It may be slow and I just have to be patience but I am getting there. 

#akofitness #prayforzinako#struggleisreal #strongerbyday#zinako #nevergiveup#keepmotivated 

#betterhealth#neardeathexperience #zlife#lifegoeson #lifeofazumbainstructor#advanceddivers 

#zumbafitness#zumbalove #keepondancing#nobullshit #noordinarywoman#fitnessfreak #nocopycat

Welcome "Upin"

2nd July 2019: the day "upin' was born. he is the 9th grandchild for my parents. yes.. a boy! our family ramai girls sebab tu nak boy lagi. originally there was supposed to be upin & ipin but unfortunately Allah swt has decided not to let ipin to stick around. so, tinggal lah upin. 

N4 yang preggy and aku rasa she had quite a challenging experience during her pregnancy. muntah dari awal sampai end of pregnancy. jenuh jugak lah. and her selera makan very limited. dia pun bebel and maki hamun tu - kena sabar je lah telinga siapa yang mendengar. not necessarily maki hamun about her pregnancy but other things happening around her. 

anyway, yesterday i went to visit upin. hahha 😁 memang la macam yaya.. so kalau orang kata adik yaya pun boleh diterima.  

presenting 'UPIN"! today dah selamat sunat... hehehe 😁

20 Years of Service - MCB

Pejam celik pejam celik dah dapat award for long service. dah jadi macam ala2 resume pulak posting ni. oklah aku summarizekan. i joined MCB in 1994 and tapi resign end of 1995 sebab pergi study kat USA in 1996. Bila balik time tu memang recession tapi rezeki aku dapat kerja kat tempat lama aku bekerja, MCB. so 1 Jan 1998 aku start kerja balik kat MCB.

today 3 July 2019 MCB buat Raya Celebration and LTSA at the same time. seronok jugak cuma LS tak de, rasa jugak kekosongan. al maklumlah kitorang selalu ada je. otai2 MCB... but tak pe lah LS ada kerja kat site, atau dia merajuk... jeng jeng jeng...

hari ni for the first time jugak time karoks, aku senyap je. macam tak de mood nak karoks. LS tak de.. DK pun balik awal pulak. but, i was lucky sebab dapat lucky draw KFC vouchers. alhamdulillah.

ini je lah posting aku kali ni. happy tapi kaki penat sebab lama pakai heels.

Bukan Cinta Aku

another malay drama that i got hooked on. maybe sebab shafiq kyle selalu tweet and maybe sebab nak tengok janna nick lagi. tak sangka dapat jumpa baim wong... hik hik hik 😋 dah lama gila kut tak tengok baim wong berlakon. pendek kata - terjebak lah gitu. 

agaknya cowok2 indonesia kalo bicara kayak gini ya.. lembut sekali pertuturan bahasanya. 

again, drama melayu, what do you expect...? cinta antara 2 darjat lah kan, apa lagi. so this riana the rich girl fell in love with his driver, arjuna (baim wong). bila tengok expression si arjuna ni kadang2 geram jugak.. macam, betul ke mamat ni sayang kat riana ni. i guess some men are not good in showing their emotions but the actual fact, they do love their women. is that right? 😁

so the thing is, kalau pun parent si riana ni bengang sangat dengan arjuna ni, bukan la dia tak berpelajaran pun, he could not continue his study coz his dad died, so tak cukup duit gitu. again, pasal si miskin dengan si kaya. oh well.. honestly, i do not think riana is able to live in a house like that la kan. unless, kalau aku riana, i would rebuild the house to be more comfy so that i can live in that house. hehehe 😀

disebabkan tahap stress yang agak melampau, semalam i skipped many episodes and jumped to the end.. ep 18 rasanya.. alaa si arjuna jadi gila!! 😭 okay, ini lain sikit lah dari drama2 yang sebelum ni. but serious kesian tengok arjuna jadi gila.. huuwaaa... 😭

so today is the final ep, ep 20, lets watch which one. sedih la jugak, kalau nak treat pun, how well can he be. baik dia dengan tengku isma tu, and he is a nice and responsible husband pun. riana ni tak tau di untung betul. disebabkan cinta, orang akan belajar menipu dan lupa ibu bapa sendiri. ibu bapa yang dah beri segala2nya untuk kebaikan anak. oh well... this is just a drama, but i supposed, mesti berlaku jugak kut, kat luar sana tu - who knows. 

lepas ni nak layan drama lain - yang MrH tengah layan... kekeke 😀 jangan tak tau, dia ni kaki drama jugak. 

yang aku pelik, kenapa pesen skirt riana dia suka pakai macam tu ek... yang ala2 tingkat2 tu. ingatkan sehelai je macam tu, but almost semua skirt dia dalam cerita tu pakai macam tu. confirm sponsored but agak2lah.. takkan semua scene pakai macam tu, kan. and her dresses reminds me of the dresses my aunt wore way back in the 80s.

pasal qisha pulak, sekarang dah nampak perangai sebenar dia. so psycho! omg.. seriously, kalau aku isma, i wont' go back to her.