Skip to main content

Relief

This is going to be a mixed postings, be warned.

i was misunderstood when i had my dreams visualized in a form of a photo. i used to have a vision board - just so that i look at it daily and in god's will it will come true. alhamdulillah some came true and some not, yet. so after many years, i came about the vision board again. the difference is, it is on social media - goes with the trend, flow? whatever you want to call it. sadly, when that was what i put up, it creates chaos in other part of my life. it seems, my dreams - my happiness creates uneasiness towards others. **sigh** it disturbs me till now. i may feel better some day - but i dont know when. 

2005, i was relieved from living in a world of liars. people who back stabbed me, and acted as though they love me but behind my back, they disapprove of my existence? i don't like to be reminded how hard it was for me, but to realize now of how that circumstances has transformed me to be a stronger person, i am blessed. of course, it has badly affected my kids.

2015, i was relieved from not being peaceful. i was happy in some way but jiwa tak tenang in some way. the toughest part was my kids, were affected again and tougher those time. 

and when after all those darkness and Allah showed me the lite of happiness, sometimes when you think people will be truly happy with your happiness, in some way or other, there will be people who will not be happy entirely. it goes with the phrase, you cannot satisfy everybody. May Allah ease this for me, and make me more receptive secara ikhlas and tenang. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Shellambak @ HangOut Bukit Antarabangsa

it started when i got the advertisement on my newsfeed. memang dah lama teringin nak makan shellout ni tapi kalau nak pergi kat Enjoys Desa Melawati sure kena beratur. and dari lapar nanti jadi kenyang and lapar balik. so, i decided to ajak my zumba sisters if they wanna try this new place found called Shellambak. and of course i bring my prince along although he was upset for awhile when he knew my zumba sisters are coming. i dont know why lah. sedangkan dia pun ajak kawan dia. aparaa..
and so, yeahh i also saw the short video clip about this Shelllambak.. sila cari di fb ye.
date of visit: 27 Jan 2018
location: Hang Out, Bukit Antarabangsa. [Cabin Style next to Petronas Gas Station] Tel: 0183636726
place & decor: simple and nice ~ relaxing for lepak. it's like food truck environment but better seats, but perhaps not wheelchair friendly so much due to the steep way up.
cleanliness: 9 out of 10. [for the whole area]
restaurant service: friendly chef, reasonable waiting time.

Day 10 - warded

today marks the 10 day i am being warded at the hospital. i don't know if this has got anything to do with my incident back in maldives in january but what i know i have vulnerable lungs at this point of time. although i tried so hard not to get myself sick, somehow the environment is not helping people like me. or was it work stress? or too much thinking of what is next life has for me? i know for sure it is somewhat about AH. hmmm too much on that. i should deviate my focus on other things - things that we/i are more certain and i can control of. 
i should just get back on track on getting really healthy. really try to do something else to distract my frustration on not having be able to do the usual exercise that uses my strength so much. so, right now, definitely no weight training, no full zumba teaching, no swimming hmm what is left? yoga?? i really need to get the time with maria.  
as i am writing this now, i just had my minor procedure to jab steroid on my right ribs for…

Tragedy 28 Jan 2019

what is with 28th of the month? this morning on March 3rd, 2019 when i woke up, i realized something scary. i was admitted 'again' to the hospital on 28 Feb 2019, just 1 month after i was admitted at the hospital in Maldives on 28 Jan 2019. yes, twice in 2 months and on the same date? what a coincidence.  how do i start? it happened on the 2nd day of my dive trip, and on the 2nd dive. it was just like any other dives. i wanted to have a separate posting on this incident in maldives. but as the time goes by, i get quite tired of irresponsible people who spread stories about my condition after the incident. 28 Jan 2019: happened on the 3rd day in maldives and 2nd dive for the day. 2nd dive site was at Miyaru Kandu, one of the most famous dive spots close to Alimatha Village in Felidhoo Atoll, Maldives, a great place where you can observe big pelagic fish. In fact “Miyaru” is the Dhihevi name for “shark”, so it is of no surprise that Miyaru Kandu is a great dive spot for catchin…