it's all about the little things that matter to me
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yes he makes me happy. he makes me feel high in the air. but off-late i do not know where this is heading and it pulls me down. someone who used to cheer me up and accompany me during my down time has somehow vanished. i have become someone who loses my energy. i have lost my genuine happiness and i felt like it shows on my face and my attitude towards life. i felt lost in him. and i lost control of myself. i have become someone who is depending on someone else to be happy. not to say that i am not happy without him - just that when he does what he does, it pulls me down - sorry if you don't get what i meant. all i wanna say is i should focus back my energy to something that benefits me rather than someone who doesn't appreciate how i feel about us. at least that is how he makes me feel now. maybe i hope too much - on him and where we are heading. maybe i am not what/who he wants. despite saying all these - my heart is still with him but i let the Almighty to decide my next steps.
anyway what i am also saying is, there will be changes in AKO Fitness. soon.... when i decide to reroute my energy - good things happen. and i hope Allah will make it easier for me insyaallah.
people fall in love everyday. some last longer and some are not. some people who are left with a short term being in love can end up living in bitterness. they will think all the negative part of their previous partners/experience. actually imo, we should always take those situation as lesson for us. and study ourselves or types of people we ended up with. anyway, i had fallen in love with different types of people. do you realize that some people when they change partners, some may end up just like their previous partners? hehehe 😀 but my own experience, i sort of upgrade my choices. there must be reasons why it doesn't last, right? and i improve myself in my next relationship. because everyone wants to be a better person each time/year/months/seconds, right? coz if you don't improve, you don't grow to be a better person and, you will end up with the same kind of shit. when you improve and change for the better, at least you will face different kind shit to deal with LO…
she tries to make herself busy. she contacted everyone that she knows just to fill up her time. as it is she is already a very busy person but there is still something amiss in her daily routine. she tries not to think of him but how can she not she her heart is with him. she tries to think of other positive things. she tries not to focus on that but the memories keep on coming back. is that what it is going to be now? just memories? it is too much, and she is suffering so bad, too bad that she didn't think that this is going to happen this year at least. has she really fallen too deep for him? but, there is nothing between the two of them. confused. yeah confused now. can someone who is not a couple missing the other so much that it hurts.
i have been browsing linkedin looking for job opportunity but why is it every time i want to update my cv i get so so lazy? perhaps it is because i have too much things to update since i have been working for than 20 years? wow... a very very long time to stay in the same company. loyal kah aku? :D