it's all about the little things that matter to me
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taken from a blog.. dah kita pun solat camne nak amik gambar, ye dak?
i felt blessed that i can perform solat terawikh with the whole family. the moment that i love during ramadhan. we would usually solat terawikh at home. and last night, suddenly i felt so syahdu... :) this year, again, i visualized him together with all of us... together with the men in the house. and i noticed that my mom did not pray sitting on a chair :) and last night, listening to our imam muda for this year, my cousin syahmie, it just cant stop the tears from falling. listening to him reciting the al fatihah and rest of the surah during prayer, just touched my heart. sejuk perut ibunya mengandungkan nya dulu :) and insyaAllah, i pray that my lil joey will be able to do the same and meng-imamkan kami sekeluarga. dan aku tahu anak2 aku masih bingung dengan keadaan dia... Ya Allah, kami pohon, Kau kuatkan lah semangat dan iman kami sekeluarga Ya Allah... kami pohon, Kau terangi lah jalan yang kami lalui Ya Allah.
i sort of started again with my fitness pal apps. but still too lazy to update food intake. you must be asking then why do i even bother have the apps? hahhah LOL 😀 well, because i sort of plan to update my fitness ranting there. coz they have a blog too. so yeah.. i will try to update my fitness story there and not here.. or maybe depends on my mood? errmm.. **being fickle.. hahaha 😀
so here is the link for my latest update. i think you can have the option to follow that blog or maybe you will have to request first?
or some people can say it is called headache. but this headache was really really bad that i felt like my eyes are popping out. i wish i can hate him or dislike him. is that what he is trying to do? testing my patience? Allahuakbar... please please ease it for me. let me see his flaws that i can get him out of my mind because that is what it seems that he wants me to do. but being me, i always see positive things in people - most of the time. in fact when i was mentally abused, i still see the good part of my abuser. these were what i learned through my difficult time before. that i trained myself to be positive. the bad side of it - i get stepped on. **sigh**
can't be talking/writing too much about this because this is the path that i have chosen. trying to get as many distractions but nothing seems to work. is it that strong my feelings for him? damnnn
what has this got to do with the title???? it messes with my head - that is why!
Jangan lagi kau sesali keputusanku Ku tak ingin kau semakin kan terluka Tak ingin ku paksakan cinta ini Meski tiada sanggup untuk kau terima Aku memang manusia paling berdosa Khianati rasa demi keinginan semu Lebih baik jangan mencintaiku aku dan semua hatiku Karena takkan pernah kau temui, cinta sejati
Berakhirlah sudah semua kisah ini Dan jangan kau tangisi lagi Sekalipun aku takkan pernah mencoba kembali padamu Sejuta kata maaf terasa kan percuma Sebab rasa ku tlah mati untuk menyadarinya Semoga saja kan kau dapati Hati yg tulus mencintaimu Tapi bukan aku