hurt

that's the only word that can describe my feelings right now. felt so hurt that i cried. could this be a sign? it really made me think that perhaps i should think it over, again. i know i should talk about it, but right now, i'd rather just keep quiet. i dunno.. i am like that. when i am sad, i'd rather keep it to myself for awhile, till i feel much better. and whether i am going to talk about it or not, it all depends.

my mom asked me just now. something that was unexpected. but i think i answered her well, although the conversation ended abruptly. what i told her was, in life, we can never get someone who is prefect. what we can learn through our past is accepting other people's flaws and loving him for what they are being with you. and i guess, in any relationship if you can accept that, you'd hope that your partner would accept that too, right? but, we can all hope for the best.

and as i am typing all these now... i ....miss... aahhh... just told AA about it. i feel like i wanna cry. or... wait, i have cried. oh well, you cant have it all...

ein better call it a night now... already 1241am... better go and hug my joelis now.