love is in the air!

ye ke tak boleh celebrate valentines? kalau sajer2 suka2 join the crowd tak boleh jugak ke? lots of emails that have been passed around when valentines is near. remembered during school time... its the most important day to remember... although i came from all girls school, we still celebrate.. :) those with boyfriends from different schools in KL, will actually received apples with chocolate on top.. :) those were the days... i had 2 apples with chocolates... and roses...OMG, from RM1.00 per stalk...became RM8.00 per stalk..no joke... hmmm those were the days... and know what, few weeks ago, i thot i would be able to celebrate valentines again. but i guess, i dont know anymore. it has been getting vague lately. i have been listening to lots of theories that really brings me down. what else can i do... i just hope that its worth waiting for... and if my heart were to be broken, i'd take it as i have gone through a lot and i am sure i can handle this, with a smile :) and baby, if you still read my blog, this is for you. and i am sorry if this is too jiwang for you but this is who i am....expressive of my feelings towards the person that i love.

baby, my dear prince charming, you have touched my heart with your charm. i dont know what went wrong, but i just want you to know that this comes from the bottom of my heart. i really miss having you around. i guess we were closer when we were friends than now, when we have become a couple. ever since you stopped sending me sms, i became lost. i cant stop my mind from making the worst assumptions. all i needed was a good explanation. my mind has never stopped thinking about you. i think of you when i wake up every morning, when i drive to work while listening to the songs that you compiled for me in the CD and when i see your signature on the CD..'with love'... gosshhh this is a dejavu man!! i have been here... shoot! know what, i am beginning to think that you might have changed your mind about us, and i feel i am not in the position to say any further. i know where i stand, as a person, but i no longer know where i stand in your life. all i have now are your words... that makes me believe that everything will be okay. that was then... now? i dont know... i am lost... i dont feel it anymore from you. everytime when i feel sad, happy, or just plain tired of something, i feel like smsing you, but when you started to treat me cold, i dont know what is right for me to do.
i miss the times when we used to spend time just talking about whatever at the gerai... restaurant etc..
and i miss your saying, 'hope to see you soon'...
i remembered the first time that you said, 'i love you'
i miss the times when you hold me close to you and not let go
i miss the times when you gave me the assurance about us
i miss the times when i am convinced that what you feel for me is real
i miss the times when you'd just put your head on my shoulder and being affectionate
i miss laughing with you
i miss dancing with you baby, or just laughing and looking at the 80s dance moves...
i miss your nite nite wishes that i dont get that often..hehehe..:D but when i do get it, it means a lot to me
i miss it when you used to say...'there you go' and it'll make me smile..with hope
i miss the person who calms me down when i start to think too much
i am sorry if this embarrase you
you showed me the light when i almost have lost faith in being in love with the right person
there are a lot more that i miss about you but just cant put everything
i want to be able to reach out to you again

now, all that i can think of are, do we still share the same feelings? do you think of me when i think of you? it hurts baby.... really hurts.. if anyone were to hurt me this much, i never imagine that it would be from you. coz, i thought we have cleared things earlier... this is definitely not the game that i want to play... i am not upset with you, i dont have the right to.. feeling is something that no one can force... i thot i would be able to celebrate valentines with the person i love, but from the look of it, i shouldnt put on any hope...although its only hope that i have..

happy valentines day baby...with all my love... and as i am signing off... my mind is still on you ;-)

jennifer, may you have a pleasant holiday on valentines day :) i am gonna miss you siol... LOL
angelina, may your love with hubby stays forever despite the distance
james, may your dream come true to be with the love of your life